


A Holliday Beginning

by PrimaDea



Category: Captain America (Comics), Marvel (Comics), Steve Rogers - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Friends to Lovers, Friendship/Love, Love, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2018-01-04
Packaged: 2019-02-22 00:57:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13155765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrimaDea/pseuds/PrimaDea
Summary: Steve had been in love with Elizabeth since he first set eyes on her, now, years later, he might get his chance.





	1. Chapter 1

It was a Stark party, one of the best ones Steve had been at in the past years. There were people everywhere, even Bucky had come down from his apartment to join the fun, there was a live jazz band, and an open bar, everyone there was holding a drink, or two, there were waiters and a buffet and from the corner of his eye Steve could see Tony and Pepper dancing close. Something he thought he’d never see again. He smiled and greeted everyone he crossed, he was happy, he was enjoying himself, letting loose. Someone grabbed him by the hand and pulled him on the dance floor and Steve laughed, letting Wanda lead, trying not to spill his drink. He swayed a bit, letting Wanda have her fun, before carefully walking away, trying no to bump into anyone, apologizing as he went. When finally he reached the sliding doors and made his way on the balcony Steve breathed a sigh of relief. He enjoyed parties, for short periods of time. Tonight, he was just about partied out. 

Looking out on the grounds Steve smiled, it was peaceful here, even with the planes and the agents and hustle and bustle on its worst days, this place was always peaceful. He heard something and looked down, passed the railing of the balcony and off towards the trees. There was someone there, he heard some sniffling and finished his drink, leaving it on the bannister, he walked down the stairs and off towards the trees and the bench sitting under them. There was a view here in the daytime, right now it was dark, he could feel the lake a few dozen feet in front of him, the trees looming over him, behind him was the large building, the lights, Steve saw the person on the bench startle as he came out of the shadows, a light dusting of snow was starting to cover the footsteps he was following towards the bench. 

“Steve.” He heard the person say. He knew that voice, loved hearing it, specially when it was to say his name. 

“Beth.” He said softly, it was the only way to say it, really, her name flowed so easily from his lips. 

“Last year I was sitting here with Mike, we had just gotten engaged, we were trying to have a baby.” She said slowly, as if she was trying to get every single syllable out, trying to get her mind around it. “ He bought a house, we found the best doctors.” She said looking up at him, and though Steve couldn’t see her eyes he knew she was crying. “ I had a future, I had a life all planned out.” Her voice trembled, he sat next to her, pulling her again him, his strong arm around her shoulders. “ Now…… Now I live in communal housing. My fiance left me, I’m five months pregnant, single, my parents won’t talk to me….. It’s like life told a joke and I haven’t gotten it yet.” Steve felt her lean into him, her head fitting nicely against his chest, he was sure she could hear his heartbeat, beating just for her. 

It was snowing harder now, the frozen lake in front of them was becoming easier to see in the dark. “ I don’t miss him though.” She added as an afterthought. “I miss the life we had planned, but I’m glad he’s gone.” Her voice was sharper now, she sounded sure of herself. He felt her cuddle even closer. 

“I know Beth.” He answered simply, kissing her head. “It’s not what you expected, life seldom is.” He heard he snort in amusement, something else he loved about her. “What, it’s true.” He said defensively. 

“Maybe, but you don’t have to sound like you’re a hundred years old.” She answered playfully, kissing him on the cheek. “Even though you are…. GrandPa Rogers.” He laughed this time, pulling her just that much closer, part of him hoping she would get the hint and kiss him, part of him scared as fuck that she would. He let go and got up, stretching, it was getting cold and though he didn’t feel the cold much he knew Beth did. Her thin coat wasn’t warm enough to keep her cozy. 

“How about I walk you home.” He said trying to cover his partial disappointment at not getting the kiss he so wanted. He moved away, hearing her stand up and feeling her slide her arm on his, making him smile. Sometimes she was quite the old school girl, he thought to himself. He felt her hand squeeze his arm and he started waking the half mile to the apartment building. The snow cracked under foot, and the trees seemed to have been transformed into something from a winter wonderland. The tiny blue and white lights in the trees made the snow seem even more magical, the picture it made was one of holiday romance, which did not pass unnoticed.

“It’s pretty tonight.” He heard Beth say, holding his arm just a little tighter, he felt her shiver and moved his arm around her, his hand resting on her waist. “I’m glad we got snow before christmas. I was starting to worry we’d have a green one this year.” She moved closer still, seeking his body heat maybe, Steve tightened his arm once more. The closer she got, the better he felt. “I don’t know if I told you, Steve, but I’m really lucky to have you in my life.” She said like that sometimes, how lucky and thankful she felt about him being there for her when she had needed someone. When she had walked in on an all but empty home in Greenwich she had called him to come and get her, had cried on his shoulder, had fallen asleep in his arms after spending the night on his bathroom floor thanks to morning sickness. She had slept in his bed while he took the couch for weeks before moving into her own place. Steve had felt it was normal for him to help, that any friend would have done the same, the thing is, her other friends hadn’t done anything like that. He squeezed her tight for a second, to let her know he understood, that he felt the same. “You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.” She said finally, looking up at him with her beautiful green eyes. 

Steve let out a groan, something he tried not to do while around her. He didn’t want to be the pinning friend, the guy that would never get the girl. But it seems that was to be his lot when it came to Beth. 

“What is it?” They had stopped walking, his arm growing slack around her, Beth stood there in front of him, her eyes searching, the apartment building a few yards away, maybe he could them there before she asked the questions he didn’t want to answer. “Steve, what’s wrong?” Her hands were on his chest, she was so close. 

“You know, maybe I don’t want to be just a friend.” He said under his breath. Beth looked at him, her eyes confused, her face unsure. 

“Did I say something wrong?” Her voice was shaky again, Steve hated himself for having made her doubt herself. 

“It’s nothing Sweetheart, I’m just tired thats all.” She nodded, taking her place again with his arm around her. “ I’m glad I could be there for you.” He said softly. He saw her smile, felt her lean her head against him and walked the rest of the way to the main door. They stood there for a bit, not moving, not saying anything. Beth seemed to not want to leave, just staying there as close to him as she could get. He felt her move slightly, and looking down at her met her eyes, looking back at him. 

“Would you come in for a tea or a hot chocolate?” She offered shyly, something he had not see her be since they had met years ago. “I know you probably want to go back to the party….. “ Beth looked away, almost embarrassed. Moving forward Steve pulled her close once again.

“I’m always in the mood for a hot chocolate.” He said before walking them to the door, up the stairs and into her place, helping her with her coat and making himself a spot on the couch. The place was cozy, there was a beautifully decorated christmas tree in a corner near the glass door leading to the balcony, a comfortable corner sofa with a worn coffee table, a large TV hanging from the wall, they had spent a few nights here, watching movies and hanging out, Beth himself and Bucky, sometimes Nat would join in, sometimes it was just the two of them, like tonight. Beth hated being alone. The living room led right into the kitchen, before heading down a hallway where Steve knew he would find two bedrooms and a bathroom, he had helped her move in, he had even done some painting and helped find the perfect decorating details. Like that beautiful picture of a forest hanging on the wall opposite the television. 

Beth came in with two mugs, set them down before making herself comfortable at the other end of the couch. Not something she usually did. Steve let her, grabbing his mug and making a show of blowing away the steam before taking a sip, he could taste the peppermint she had added, just like he liked it. He saw her startled and move uncomfortably. He saw her look at him, a bit shy, again. 

“It still surprises me when she moves.” Beth said simply. “She barely moves at all during the day, but as soon as I sit down or get to bed, she goes and starts kicking.” He saw her smile then, a sad smile on those most beautiful lips. She looked away, self consciously, again not something he had seen Beth do often in his presence. “I’m just going to change into something more comfortable….. Nothing barely there, don't worry, I know no one wants to see that.” She said it as a joke, but Steve could feel the awkwardness in her statement, he saw her get up and walk away, before hearing the bedroom door open, there were some grunts and annoyed noises before she finally re-appeared in a pair of flannel pyjamas. Steve couldn’t seem to keep his eyes off her, she let herself fall back on the couch, pulling the nearest comforter up and around herself, as if she were hiding. 

“I’m sorry, I’m not good company tonight.” He saw her fidget with the trim on the comforter, as if a seam was coming apart. “Thanks for coming though, I really don't want to be alone tonight,” She tried to look away, tried to look at anything and everything except for him, but Steve got closer, taking her hands in his and suddenly Beth had no choice. “ I hate it.” She said her voice cracking. “I hate this, being pregnant, being alone, being alone and pregnant.” She snorted, half laugh half cry. “I wanted this so badly. For years all I wanted was to get pregnant, for Mike, for us.” Beth reached over grabbing a tissue before wiping her nose. “ Now I don’t know anymore.” She smiled sadly at him, and all Steve could do was pull her into him and hold her close. 

“I know Beth, I know it’s gonna be so much harder than you ever thought it would be, but I promise, you’re not alone.” He said trying not to laugh at how bad his pep talk was. She looked up at him, a bit confused.

“That is the worst pep talk I’ve ever gotten,” Steve rolled his eyes, smiling at her. “I mean, wow.” She added smiling back. They laughed a bit, Steve not wanting to let go of her, loving how she felt in his arms. Beth got comfortable, half sitting on his lap, half on the sofa arm. “You know what the worst thing about this being pregnant thing is?” She was looking at him, her eyes meeting his, a half smile on her lips. Steve wasn’t sure what she was going to com up with. “Being horny all the fucking time.” She added matter of factly, in Steve’s opinion, gauging his reaction. He looked at her, still trying to find a comfortable position perched between his legs and the couch, she had looked away once he had noticed that what she said wasn't a joke, now he just sat there, his arm around her, his hand on her hip, wondering what she expected from him. 

Steve wasn’t sure what to feel, was Beth being serious, was she expecting something from him, a reaction, surprise maybe, or did she want him to know what she needed from him. Instinctively he pulled her on his lap, making sure she wouldn't get away, but instead of her trying to squirm as he had expected, she twisted in her seat and faced him, eye to eye. Those magnificent green eyes staring right to the depths of his soul, or so it felt to Steve. 

“It’s true, you know, It’s like I’m on fire half the time and nothing can put me out; it can last hours. It’s like I’m going nuts.” Beth looked at him innocently, Steve was pretty sure she had no idea what effect she was having on him. He felt her slide off his lap and move back to her seat on the other side of the couch. “I’m sorry Steve, I don’t mean anything by it. It’s just….. It’s hard.” She said again, pulling the comforter again and turning the television on giving her an excuse to not look at Steve, it was obvious Beth was embarrassed. Steve took a few minutes to center himself before leaning in and taking the remote control away from her porcelain like hands. He shut the television off, dropping the remote somewhere Beth couldn’t reach before sitting back and stretching his arms on the back on the couch. He wasn’t sure what to say or do, he felt vulnerable and quite the bumbling idiot when it came to women and sex, sure he’d had his share of partners, but never anything worth a second night and definitely not worth writing home about. Taking a deep breath he channeled his inner Bucky, something he very, very rarely did. 

“You want to know the worst thing about being Captain America?” He asked, half laughing at himself, which must have looked to Beth as if he were teasing. He saw her look at him, shaking her head, curiosity written across her face. He smiled, trying to his best to seem charming, sexy even, though he was sure he was failing. “No one takes me seriously when it comes to sex, it’s like I’m this virginal adult/child that no ones believes has needs or wants.” He looked at her, his eyes studying her. She sat there looking at him, her green eyes focused on his blue ones, the conversation had quickly moved onto a topic he was not comfortable with, and he could see Beth hesitating.

Steve reached out his hand, unmoving, waiting to see if she would react, her eyes were still on his, confused, questioning, but slowly, her hand moved and she gently laid it in his much bigger one. His fingers closed over hers and he led her to him, his arms opening up to let her sit in his lap, something she did often, but never like this, they had never done anything like this. It was scary and exhilarating, and Steve hoped that this time Beth might respond to him the way he responded to her. He could feel her heartbeat speed up as she curled up in his lap, her arms coming up around his neck, his arms holding her close, this was as intimate as it had ever gotten between them and Steve had to admit, this was as far as he had ever hoped to get.

They sat like that for awhile, Steve just holding her, thinking about what else to say, what to do, this whole situation was awkward and part of him wished he had just ignored her when she had talked about sex and moved on. 

“I didn’t mean to make it sound like it did.” He heard her say, “I’m not in dire need of sex.” She let the last word trail, “It’s just that some days it’s all I can think about. I know it’s hormones, but it’s just so hard to control.” He felt her cuddle closer, her arms tightening around his neck, pulling him closer. “There’s no one here for me. I mean, I even thought of asking Bucky.” She said in a tiny little voice as if she feared his reaction. Steve chuckle. 

“Really, you’d ask Bucky before you’d ask me?” Steve hoped he didn’t sound bitter. “I get it,” He tried to sound as if he were laughing it off. “He’s tall dark, handsome. Totally not an ex assassin. I can see how he would be the perfect choice.” This time though he was sure she heard it, He tried to move her off him so he could walk around, get rid of this negative emotion, but she refused, sitting there and holding onto him just that much tighter.

“Steve, don’t.” Her hand came to his face, soft and gentle, brushing his lips before caressing his cheek. “It’s not like that.” Her eyes met his, full of uncertainty. “You’re my friend, I didn’t want you to feel……. Obliged.” She said those words like they were nothing, just her truth to be spoken. “The last I want is to lose you because you feel like as my friend you HAVE to be there for me. I don’t want that.” She added looking away. Steve nuzzled her hand, kissed it, before looking up again and meeting her eyes. She moved closer, slowly, tentatively, letting him close the gap between them, his lips touched hers and he felt elated.

“Beth,” He whispered breathlessly as they parted, her green eyes aimed at his. “We can’t go back from this, are you sure?” He asked hoping she would would in fact be sure. She looked at him, slightly confused, her eyes focussing on his lips before finding his blue eyes again. She bit her lower lip, her hands holding tightly on his shirt. She stayed like that for only a second before nodding lightly. 

“I know.” She answered simply, Steve tried not to smile, He had been wanting this, hoping, dreaming for this to happen, maybe not exactly like this, Steve had hoped for something more romantic, maybe a few dates, getting to know her on another level. Not looking a gift horse in the mouth was something he had never been very good at, but in this instance, he would more than gladly take it. “It doesn’t have to be anything other than sex, you know. “ She added looking shy, “We don’t have to make this into anything if you don’t want to.” Of course he wanted to, fuck he was in love with this woman, all he wanted was to make her his, to hold her to love her, but Steve acted cool, still channelling his inner Barnes he just shrugged, smiling casually.

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.” He said trying to sound as confident as he could. It was only an instant, but Steve saw Beth’s smile falter, coming right back up as if nothing had been said. Instead of apologizing and trying to make things better, which Steve Rogers would have done, the inner Bucky just waved it off as nothing important and instead leaned in for another kiss. 

Just like the first, this one was soft, tentative, slowly he felt her gain assurance, her finger finding their way to his shoulders, pulling him closer. He slid his arms around her waist, moving her to his lap where he moved his lips to her neck as she whispered his name. It was all more than Steve could have ever hoped for. They kissed, touched, licked and bit whatever they could get their mouths on, Steve finally getting the courage to unbutton Beth’s top, casually throwing it across the room before making himself acquainted with his partner’s perfect breasts. They took their time, there was no need for talking, except when it was time to move or for Beth to get more comfortable until finally, Steve picked her up in his strong arms and brought her to the bedroom. 

Steve laid her down gently, taking his place next to her, they stayed there for a bit, not moving, their fingers interlaced, looking up at the ceiling, glow in the dark stars. The feeling in here was different than it had been out in the living room. Here everything seemed to have slowed down, even Steve’s heart beat. Bringing her hand to his lips Steve laid a soft kiss. Running his thumb over her knuckles before turning around to look at her. It had been so hot only minutes ago, now they both laid here doing nothing. Looking at her in the dark he could only see her silhouette and was disappointed for the lack of light. He loved looking at her, and here, like this, half naked in bed, he was sure she made a sight for sore eyes. Changing gears Steve brought his hand to her belly, her skin soft and hot under his fingers, he felt her move into the touch and Steve heard her sigh. He felt something poking at him from under his hand.  
“Shit” he whispered as he felt it again, this tiny little bump against the inside of his hand. “That’s…. Wow.” He was without words. He heard Beth giggle, a sound Steve absolutely adored. 

“She’s quite a kicker.” Steve agreed. “Everytime I lie down she goes to town. It’s like i'm her own personal punching bag.” He kept his hand there just to feel the kicks, before leaning closer and leaving a series of kisses on the taunt skin. Beth’s fingers worked through his hair and had Steve been a cat he would have purred. He felt her fingers pulling on his hair, coaxing him higher, and he let her lead him, leaving a trail of kisses as he went, unti again, he was kissing those perfect plump lips. They kissed some more until Beth, laid on her side and cuddled up to Steve. Steve lay there looking up at the ceiling as Beth’s breathing deepened, her head on his chest, his arm around her possessively. When finally he was sure she slept Steve kissed her forehead, whispered an honest heartfelt “I love you” and closed his eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

Steve stretched, his arm above his head grabbing the sheets in a tight fist, Waking up slowly, his breathing heavy, his muscles taunt, he groaned, low in his throat. His eyes opened slowly, feeling something warm, wet and soft licking up his shaft, it took him a few seconds to realize just what was going on, his right hand tangled in Beth’s hair as she gave him the best damned felacio he had ever gotten. Part of him thought about stopping her, but the rest of him just wanted more. His hips bucked but he tried to control himself, his fingers tightening in her hair, gently holding her still as he slowly started to fuck her face, waking up to morning lovemaking was something he had never experience, but he hoped it might become something habitual. His jaw clenched and he moaned feeling a wave of pleasure rising slowly, still he moved his hips, loving the way her tongue twirled around his dick when he pushed into her mouth. Steve heard Beth moan, felt her tongue harder as he moved in and out until he felt the wave strengthen, pulling him in until he couldn’t fight it anymore and finally, let go. His hands slackened and he let go of her hair, caressing her skin as she moved up, kissing his hot skin as she went, his other hand coming to find her face, cuping it as he pulled her up to him and kissed her. He tasted himself in the kiss but didn’t mind, instead, he kissed again, so much more demanding. Beth crawled over him, seating herself comfortable over his midsection as he could feel himself rise up to the occasion once again. His hands caressing her skin he noticed she was fully undressed, her flannel pants nowhere to be seen. 

He pulled her in, closer, her pregnant stomach tight against his, as he kissed her breathless, his hands on her hips moving her to where he wanted her, his hips jerking once or twice before Beth moved slowly backwards, just enough to rise on her knees and, with Steves help, slide herself down his shaft, a light sigh escaping her open lips. 

She was gorgeous, her green eyes wide, back so taunt it arched backwards, breasts full and demanding of his attention, there was so much to look at, so many parts of her to appreciate that Steve didn’t know where to look. His hands moved from her hips to her stomach, massaging it softly, his hands working on the tight skin, loving the feel of it under his fingers. Beth moved on top of him, moving her hips, the noises she made making Steve groan, this was IT, this is what he had been dreaming about for months, his hands met Bet’s hips and he took control of her movements, faster, slower, harder, he felt her push herself down, taking him deeper, bouncing instead of siding, faster, deeper. Steve found her sweet spot, wetting his finger and moving it over her nub and gently rubbing it, hearing Beth respond to his ministration he continued, soon feeling her tighten her muscles as she came, letting herself go on top of him her moans turning to mewls as she fell on top of him in a puddle of satisfied goo. Steve gently moved them to their sides. Gently he coaxed her to turn around, lying against her, he slowly slipped back inside, sighing at the warmth, sliding in and out, gently. His lips left kisses on her back, her side, her neck, anywhere they could reach, loving the taste of her skin and the way she moved into his touch, giggling when he tickled her, moaning or groaning when he found a sensitive spot, he soon found out Beth was the ticklish kind, it made him smile. Steve pumped his hips in slow rhythm,matching his kisses to his hip thrusts, it didn’t matter if he finished, all Steve wanted was to keep making love to his Beth. The sounds she made were adorable, light sighs, soft moans, whispering his name, her arm stretched tight behind her so she could touch him, hold his head closer, have him kiss her neck, letting him get closer, deeper, he held her so close, his arm around her, his other under the pillow, his hand holding hers, when he felt himself close again his hold tightened just a bit more, as he came, his lip found the crook of her neck and he left a soft kiss, his teeth biting the lobe of her ear teasingly.. He felt her turn towards him and cuddle closer, her breath shallow against his neck, her fingers dragging along the curve of his ear, tickling him. His hand met hers and their fingers intertwined as he brought it to his ips and laid a kiss on it before finding her lips and claiming them, leaving them breathless. 

“Merry Christmas.” He heard her whisper with a giggle, Steve smiled, tightening his grip for just a second. 

“Christmas is tomorrow.” He said simply, “If you think you get away with being cheap now… you’ve got another thing coming young lady.” He said nuzzling her hair and kissing her head. They were getting together with friends later to go shopping, later that night the Avengers were having a private Christmas party and tomorrow was the real deal, doing nothing but trying to sleep off the food and drink coma, and maybe, just maybe cuddling all day with Beth. 

She turned in his arms, looking at her bedside table, before coming back to his arms and nuzzling back in place.

“We should get up, Nat was very precise that we needed to leave at nine thirty.” Steve stretched, moving away from his comfortable position and sitting up. “We have just enough time to grab a coffee and shower.” She added getting up herself. “I’ll make coffee, you go and shower.” She smiled at him as she said it, moving around her bedroom still as naked as the day she was born, Steve’s eyes followed her, until she grabbed a robe and wrapped it around herself, giggling at him, throwing his pants at his smug smile as she walked out the door. Steve took a look around his clothes thrown haphazardly around the room, smiling to himself he picked them up before heading to the bathroom for a well deserved shower.

By the time Steve and Beth got into the waiting car they had managed to shower, dress and look halfway presentable. It was easy for Beth, she had on fresh clean clothes, but Steve, in his party slacks and a dress shirt looked a bit out of place. Neither Bucky nor Nat said a word as Beth sat in the back seat between Wanda and herself while Steve sat in the passenger seat next to Bucky. It wasn’t a strange thing, him sleeping at Beth’s he’d taken over the guest bedroom on more than one occasion, but Bucky’s side smile and teasing looks seemed telling to the fact that he knew what had happened between them. 

“What?” Steve said challengingly. Bucky just shook his head and drove off, heading for the mall. 

“Nothing. Just preparing myself for the nightmare that is going to the shopping mall on Christmas Eve.” He answered innocently. Steve stared at him for a minute, not sure if Bucky was being facetious. “Maybe I can get a picture with Santa.” He added winking at Steve, “Maybe we could all get one.” Steve shook his head, looking out the window.  
“Just ask me. I know you’re dying to.” Steve said plainly, wiping his hands over his face. The music was loud in the back and he knew the girls wouldn’t be able to hear them. Bucky smiled, looking at the back seat through the rearview mirror, then looking at Steve with a quirked eyebrow. 

“So?.......” Bucky Looked straight ahead not wanting to seem too interested. “I wouldn’t have said anything, but you’ve never taken a shower at Beth’s before, so… I gotta ask.” Steve could have punched him, Bucky and his stupid shit eating smirks. Instead, he grunted, looking out the window at the snowy terrain. 

“It just happened.” He said under his breath. “We had an interesting talk last night and this morning, things….. Developed.” He added in a matter of fact way, trying to sound like it was no big deal though both men knew it was. “But I think I fucked up.” He continued, unsure. 

“What d’you do now Stevie?” Bucky asked in a patronizing tone, “did you tell her you love her, already?” Steve shook his head.

“No!, nothing like that, Just the opposite actually.” Bucky looked at him, a look of confusion on his face. “She mentioned it not having to mean anything, you know, just being ...Sex, no strings attached I guess…… You know…. Like Fuck Friends I guess.” Steve rubbed the back of his neck, even though he was an adult, talking so openly about sex was something he had never been quite comfortable with. “So I agreed, but maybe a bit too quickly…. You know.” Bucky shook his head.

“No, Steve I don’t know, What do you mean?” 

“I think she actually does want more, she seemed disappointed.” Bucky bit his lip, something he only did when he was trying very hard to not make a comment. “What is it ?” Steve asked rolling his eyes. “Just say what you got to say.” 

Bucky seemed to think before he spoke, running his hand through his hair.   
“Why did you say that though? “ Turning to check his blind spot Bucky turned into the parking lot, and, taking his time, found them a spot not to far from the main doors, quite a feat in and of i itself on a busy Christmas Eve. The ladies got out of the car, waiting for Bucky and Steve. Steve sat there, thinking. “I mean….. I know you like her, a lot, why would you say that? Why agree to something you know damn well you can’t do.” Steve sighed and Bucky took the keys out of the ignition. “Anyways, let's go out there and show these ladies a good time.” Bucky smiled at him. “It’ll be ok Steve.” He added before opening the door and getting out of the car.

The day went by pleasantly, the girls walking into every single store in the place while Steve and Bucky waited outside, sometimes going in, giving their opinions, Beth would often look his way, or open her mouth to say something, then change her mind, often she would smile at him, a small knowing smile, then look away blushing. It was cute, at least, Steve thought so, Bucky on the other hand, rolled his eyes everytime he would catch the interactions. Eventually the group split, and Steve and Bucky were left on their own. 

“Well that’s totally not obvious.” Bucky said as the ladies were walking away. “You guys need to get a room.” He added bumping his shoulder into Steve’s intentionally. “You’re lucky.” He added in a whisper. “That girl is mad about you.” 

The men walked around, filling their Christmas shopping list as they went, Steve was lucky he had already bought Beth’s gift a few weeks earlier, had he waited till now, he would have never been able to figure out what to get her. They all met up again for a late lunch before heading back to the compound. 

Steve found himself alone, having to wrap gifts and write cards, he had something for everyone, even Vision. Christmas had always been a special time for Steve, it was a time where his mom would work extra shifts in order to get some specialty foods on the table, she would carefully wrap something special for him and put it under their tree, a comic book, or some chocolate, an orange. For him Christmas had been about making others happy, about being together and celebrating love. Tonight he would go to midnight mass, as he had always done, Bucky had said he’s go with him, something they used to do way back when. He wondered if maybe Beth would join him, but then maybe it would be to intimate, to much to fast. As a friend he would have asked her, no hesitation, but now, he just didn’t know what was and wasn’t ok. At least he was sure she would love her gift. Season tickets to the philharmonic, Classical composers, something she had always said she wanted. He smiled to himself, sure of his choice. 

Bringing the packages and placing them under the huge tree in the common room, Steve took his time, making sure every gift was well placed, the envelopes safely hung on branches, the names on them written with a perfect calligraphy. Steve came and went a few times in order to bring all the presents, large and small, but once they were under the tree, joined with all the others, there was no place left under the huge tree. Steve looked at it, from the tip of the golden star adorning it al the way to the bottom, loving the thousands of white lights mixed in with the hundreds of other colourful adornments, Steve loved Christmas, always had, but this year, he could feel it, this year would be the best one yet, surrounded by all his friends, his family, really, he would remembers the ones he had lost, appreciate their passage in his life, and share happy memories. This was a safe time, a safe place, filled with people he loved and trusted. 

Steve was startled by a squeeze on his shoulder, Bucky.

“It’s gorgeous, isn’t it ?” He asked his friend, still looking at the tree. He heard Bucky hum in agreement. “Still on for mass tonight?” 

“Yeah, of course. Just like old times, I wouldn’t miss it.” Steve turned to face his friend, pulling him in a tight hug. “Merry Christmas Stevie.” 

“You to Buck, Merry Christmas.” They held tight for a second more before letting go, slapping each other on the shoulders as they moved away. Laughter made both Steve and Bucky look towards the kitchen, Nat stood there, baking one of famous russian cakes that everyone loved, talking to Beth and laughing at something as she went. Beth sat there, at the counter holding a steaming mug, her hair loose, falling past her shoulders in a cascade of chestnut locks. She wore a tight green top, showing off her baby bump as well as a perfect beautiful cleavage and a pair of long and loose black pants, her feet bare. He was staring, Steve was sure of it, but he couldn’t help it. A quick shove from Bucky made him look away.

“You’re staring, it’s creepy.” Steve shook his head, looking away and trying not to laugh at himself. He was being pathetic, now, staring at Beth, when all he had to do was cross the room and go talk to her. The girls laughed again, Beth turning to look at him, he saw her blush and quickly look down then back at Nat, still smiling, still blushing. Nat was looking at him now, with a knowing smile, she said something to Beth who looked away, blushing even more deeply. Steve couldn’t hear what they were saying, but Nat looked his way again and with raised eyebrows, invited him to join them. Steve tried to ignore it, but Natasha was insistent, and so, after a few seconds of being stared at by the ex-russian spy, he gave in and walked over, trying to seem natural, calm and collected, which, he was not. 

Natasha greeted him with a welcoming smile as Beth tried to get a grip on her blushing. The ladies sharing a look, Beth looking embarrassed, and still that deep blush on her face, she was playing with her hair, looking at the tips of it, trying to find split ends or something. Steve smiled to himself, knowing this conversation would be painful, Natasha did have a flair for the embarassing. 

“Nat, don’t.” He heard Beth whisper as he reached them. “Please, it’s really not that important.” 

“What’s not important?” Steve asked as he got there, picking up the smell of Vanilla chai in Beth’s steaming mug. Beth turned away, picking up her mug, apologizing under her breath amn moved away, looking at Nat with something akin to annoyance in her eyes. She moved past him, her hand gently skimming his back as she went, smiling at him as she walked away, making herself a spot on the couch next to Bucky and looked at the tree. 

Looking back at Natasha Steve furrowed his brow. 

“What was that all about?” He asked, annoyed that Natasha had done anything to embarrass Beth. “That wasn’t cool Romanov.” Natasha looked passed him, towards the couch. 

“No Steve, what isn’t cool is letting her think whatever you guy got going is just for fun, when you damned well know you’re not wired for that.” She looked at him, her eyes finding his, her face stearn. “She wants more Steve, Beth isn't wired for the fuck friends thing either. You guys need to talk.” She looked down at what she was doing, pouring the batter in the cake mold, making sure not to leave any behind. “Beth is crazy about you, always has been. But Steve.” She said as her hand found his and squeezed. “Be careful, maybe ask her why Mike left.” And with that she turned around, stuffed the cake mold in the readied oven and walked away.


End file.
